Stress Management 101

I woke up again in a cold sweat with my heart beating out of my chest. It was happening increasingly often. But the worst part was not being able to go back to sleep. That was my life for many years! And then, my stepdaughter came to live with us. She was plagued by several issues which meant that home was no longer the haven it had been. For 2 years, my life felt like I was going from the fire (work) into the frying pan (home).

I was experiencing episodic acute stress. This is the type of stress our healthcare workers experience on a regular basis and even more so since the onset of COVID. This is due to consistently having to meet tight deadlines or being in a profession where stress is high on a continual basis. For myself, it felt like all I was doing was dealing with crises, one after the other and I was getting no reprieve.

Another reason I was stressed was because I felt stuck. I remember feeling like I was a hamster on a wheel, endlessly going around in circles dealing with the same issues day in and day out. Add to that the fact that I was finding my job less and less fulfilling and it was a recipe for disaster.

When we're stressed, it's hard to focus on anything else. We can't relax and enjoy life. Worse yet, frequent, and persistent stress has been linked to all sorts of health problems.

If you're feeling stuck and stressed, don't worry, you're not alone. A lot of women deal with this issue. The good news is that there are things we can do to manage our stress and improve our quality of life. And it all starts with making sure we have good, supportive habits in our life. In this post, we'll discuss some tips for reducing stress and creating a more peaceful lifestyle. Let's get started!

Identify the Sources of Stress

This is the first and most important step in managing your stress. If you don't know what's causing your stress, you can't do anything to reduce it. But once you identify the sources of stress in your life, you can begin to address them.

How do you do that? By journaling and tuning in to our body. When we first start on the journey, we may be in such a state of constant stress, that it can be difficult to know what is actually causing our stress. It is, therefore, important to start writing down how we feel. If you don't currently have a journaling practice, I highly recommend you start one. When you take the time to review your day and write down the situations, causes and people that stressed you out, you become more self-aware and can start to discern patterns that trip you up and contribute to your stress. It's important to write down not only how you feel physically but emotionally.

How Stress Affects the Body and Mind

First, it's important to understand how stress affects our bodies. When we're stressed, our bodies go into "fight or flight" mode. This means that the body releases hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. These hormones prepare us to either face a threat or flee from it. While this response can be helpful in emergency situations, like being chased by a tiger, it's not so great when it's constantly activated. When we're endlessly stressed, our bodies remain in this "fight or flight" state, which can lead to all sorts of health problems.

And stress manifests in different ways physically: rapid heartbeat, cold sweat, confusion, grinding your teeth at night, stomach issues, shaky hands and many more. Tuning into your body will help to recognize how stress shows up for you. Emotionally, you may feel angry, anxious or have trouble sleeping. Any of these, especially when they interfere with your ability to work, require your immediate attention.

The Benefits of Proper Stress Management

When we manage our stress properly, we can experience several benefits. We can:

• Think more clearly and make better decisions
• Cope with demanding situations more effectively
• Improve our moods
• Have a healthier outlook on life
• Maintain our energy levels throughout the day
• Make better food choices (not self-medicating)
• Have better relationships with our loved ones
• Respond to situations rather than reacting to them

Healthy Coping Mechanisms for Managing Stress

A lot of us see stress as a bad thing. But it's actually a normal and necessary part of life. Without some stress, we wouldn't be motivated to accomplish anything. The key is to find a healthy balance. This means learning how to manage our stress in a way that doesn't negatively affect our health. There are several healthy coping mechanisms. Some of these include exercise, relaxation techniques, and journaling (as mentioned above). If you're not sure what will work for you, it's important to experiment and find what works best. Here's what I found work for me:

Get some clarity: Stress can come from a lack of clarity about who we are and want to be and what we want. When you don't know either or one of those two things, it's easy to get blown by the winds of stress. When we know who we are, how we want to show up for ourselves and others and what we want for our life, we're like a mighty oak with roots firmly planted. It takes a lot to get us uprooted. You can begin to get that clarity by having a self-reflection routine. One of the things I do, for example, is a review of my week on Sundays. It helps me to see where I showed up congruently and where I didn't. From there, I can readjust.

Mind your health and energy: That takes different shapes. Exercising goes a long way in managing stress. It is as good for the body as it is for the mind. Eat whole foods as much as possible, rather than processed foods. Look for ways to relax; that could be meditation, taking a bath, stretching, going for a walk on the beach. Any activity that you know helps you relax, lean into that. And even though you may be tempted to have a drink or two, avoid alcohol as it causes inflammation in the brain, so while it may provide short-term relief, in the long run it makes you less able to manage stress. Instead, make sure you get plenty of water!

Be courageous: Draw your own line in the sand of what you will accept or not. Having clarity helps with that. Nobody said you have to be a martyr. Decide what is right for you, set your boundaries and stick to them as much as you can. I'm not saying there won't be times when you need to cross them, but those times should be the exception, not the rule.

Rely on your network: When you see thing going sideways and you begin to experience too much stress, speak up! Let it be known. There's only so much we can do on our own, so give your manager an opportunity to help improve things. If nothing changes, then have the courage to change your circumstances, whether that is moving to another department, leaving your company, or deciding to strike it out on your own.

Manage your productivity: I know well the days I spent sitting at my desk for hours on end, not getting up, not drinking water, not stretching. Not only does it leave you feeling depleted, but because of that, stress can become overwhelming. There are two strategies I always recommend to my clients. One, work in blocks of 50-75 minutes, then take a break. Science has shown that after 75 minutes, your ability to focus goes down and does your productivity. The other is to have little recharging routines in place in between those blocks. You can breathe and bounce, go for a short walk, stretch, do a 5-minute walking meditation. The important thing is to move.

Seek Professional Help

We all should have a standard for our own quality of life. If you've put in place coping mechanisms and you are still struggling to manage your stress on your own, it might be time to seek professional help. A coach or a therapist can help you understand and manage your stress in a healthy way.

Final Words

Stress is a part of life, but it doesn't have to take over your life. By implementing some or all the strategies above, you can take back control and live a stress-free life! 

And repeat to yourself, "Today, I refuse to stress myself out about things I cannot control or change".

What are some of the tactics you use to manage stress?